


Chatlogs from an Aztec related chatroom

by Tezca



Series: The crazy life of Lionel and the Aztec gods he lives with [3]
Category: Aztec Religion, Fur (2006)
Genre: Chatlogs, Gen, Humor, chatroom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-08
Updated: 2013-12-08
Packaged: 2018-01-03 23:11:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1074163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tezca/pseuds/Tezca
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tezca thinks he's being mocked and Quetzal likes Homestuck.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chatlogs from an Aztec related chatroom

*Lionel has joined #aztecmythology*  
*Guest1397343 has joined #aztecmythology*  
*LordofStorm has joined #aztecmythology*

Lionel: Oh hello, its nice to see someone new join the chat,

*Guest1397343 changed nick to Anne

Anne: Thanks, I heard this was a good chatroom for those interested in the Aztec culture. I’ve always been fascinated by that and other mesoamerican societies. Its all so interesting.

Lionel: Indeed it is, I’m hope you have a wonderful time here.

Anne: I hope so, I found one other related chatroom, but it turned out it was mostly full of trolls and the mods weren’t exactly great at their jobs.

Lionel: Some are like that sadly. 

LordofStorm: You don’t have to worry about any major problems here, Lionel here, Batman221, and 2 others are very good ops here. Any trolls found are instantly banned,

Lionel: Which reminds me I have to unban SmokeyEspejo, his suspension is up.

Anne: Thats good, you mind if I ask a question though, I heard rumors that some of the Aztec gods themselves frequent this chat..

Lionel: That is true Anne, though only a few do, and some go elsewhere to chat.

Anne: Interesting, and I can guess who SmokeyEspejo is then, Tezcatlipoca.

LordofStorm: Yep. Also known as the Aztec god of getting banned from chatrooms in 5 minutes or less.

Anne: lol

midnightcowboy: Lol, Tlaloc right though dude, we have a bet everytime he comes in to see how fast he will last before getting suspended, so prepare for a lot of crazyness when Tezca comes in.  
Lionel: Yeah, he already managed to scare off a couple of newcomers when they came in on one of those days so you’re lucky you ran into us.

Anne: Guess so, well at least now I’m ready for it.. 

*SmokeyEspejo has entered #aztecmythology

SmokeyEspejo: GUESS WHO'S BACK PUNY MORTALS! 

The13thTimelord: ….and right on cue

SmokeyEspejo: I’m sure you all missed me so terribly and Lionel we seriously got to stop doing the same old monotonous song and dance of me getting unfairly suspended for 3 days 5 times every month.

midnightcowboy: and Tezcatlipoca has arrived, the betting table is now open.

Lionel: We would if you stop getting yourself suspended everytime you come back.

The13thTimelord: 12 minutes

NerdyAztech: 10 for me.

SmokeyEspejo: Well maybe if you just stop being such a good two shoes fun hater.

SmokeyEspejo: Oh lookie here someone I haven’t seen in here before, why hello Anne welcome to our little chatroom.

LordofStorm: Don’t scare her off Tezcatlipoca.

SmokeyEspejo: And what made you think I would scare off the fresh newbie here? Don’t you have anything better to do then make false accusations first thing I come in here?

LordofStorm: Cause you tend to scare off most newcomers right off the bat and put me down for 5 minutes midnight.

SmokeyEspejo: You know I still don’t approve of this stupid betting game you guys do everytime I come in here.

Lionel: You just don’t like it because the target is you instead of some other poor soul.

SmokeyEspejo: WELL I DON’T LIKE THIS MOCKERY OF ME! I DEMAND YOU BASTARDS STOP THIS RIGHT THIS INSTANT!

SmokeyEspejo: FOR I AM TEZCATLIPOLKA GOD OF THE NIGHT!

*LordofStorm snickers*

*Lionel laughs*

SmokeyEspejo: And what is so damn funny that you find peons amusing?

midnightcowboy: lol nice typo there oh great Aztec god.

The13thTimelord: I could’ve sworn that an ancient god like you would be able to spell his name right.

SmokeyEspejo: Oh shut up all of you!

Anne: So god of grammar is obviously not part of his job description then.

*SmokeyEspejo has quit #aztecmythology(I GOT BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN TO TAKE THIS MOCKERY OF ME BY LOWLY MORTALS!)*

LordofStorm: Well I don’t need to be a god to tell that Anne is going to end up a regular here.  
\---------------------

*Lionel changed topic to woke up to a peaceful start with dear Quetzal only to have Lord Huitzilopochtli got offended at breakfast at something trivial Lord Tonatiuh said and now the main dining room is destroyed, how was your day?*

midnightcowboy: Rough start I take it huh? That happens to all of us.

Lionel: I was the only one tall enough to restrain Lord Huitzil from doing any more damage. It was probably more wishful thinking on my part, but I was hoping today would be one of those rare days where nothing too chaotic happened.

Lionel: Now I’m in my room with Quetzalcoatl on our laptops ignoring the yelling thats going on between Lord Huitzilopochtli and Ometeotl..

midnightcowboy: You guys weren’t kidding when you said long ago how it was never boring living up there.

Lionel: Never is and I like that to be honest. Never feels boring.

*HeirofBreath has joined #aztecmythology

HeirofBreath: It’s Quetzal by the way, I’ve been on a Homestuck kick lately.

Lionel: I can vouch for that, he spend the past few days reading the entire webcomic.

HeirofBreath: This internet culture is both fascinating and and makes me have questions about humanity at the same time.

midnightcowboy: Internet can do that.

HeirofBreath: But it also led me to discover many wonderful things people put on there, like Homestuck for instance.

midnightcowboy: I see, well Homestuck not really my thing, but a few other people here are fans.

Blue21: Did someone say Homestuck!? Omg I didn’t really think one of you guys would have time for things created by us mortals.

HeirofBreath: Oh but we do have lots of time, have ever since the Aztec empire fell.

Blue21: Makes sense, so sorry have to ask this first since last time I gave my opinion I got yelled at, what’s your opinion on Vriska?

HeirofBreath: Well, she is just simply operating on what she knows by Alternian social standards, however wrong her choices may be in our perspective. You have to remember Alternia is a different planet which means they go by different societal norms and values. So what makes sense to her, doesn’t to us.

Blue21:.....omg you are the first person I’ve asked that whose answer wasn’t she’s a bitch...I applaud you. 

LordofStorms: lol

midnightcowboy: You mean like how the Aztecs viewed human sacrifice and all that stuff compared to the European perspective?

HeirofBreath: Hmm..I guess it would be a similar thing thing there.

Blue21: Great you just given me an idea for a new AU fic…..I hate you.

midnightcowboy: You’re welcome.

LordofStorms: So the Aztecs would be the trolls and the Spanish would be the humans and I guess that means we would be...troll gods hahaha.

Lionel: Lord Tezca would literally be a troll instead of a figurative one….can you imagine?

HeirofBreath: Yes and I don’t want to...oh dear sweet ometeotl I rather be force fed blood from a sacrifice then imagine Tezcatlipoca with horns.

Lionel: lol same here dear Quetzalcoatl

LordofStorm: Would that mean we would be one color above fuschia to signify our godly status?

LordofStorm: Since according to canon the highest blood color is royalty.

HeirofBreath: Good question, but I think given the lifespans for fuchsia and violet bloods and if we were to adjust it a bit for Earth terms, we would be the fuschia bloods and the royal family would the violet bloods.

Blue21: So by that logic then, the Reverend Speakers back in Aztec times would be seadwellers.

LordofStorms: Sounds good to me.

Blue21: I wonder how Hussie would react if he knew some of his fans were also gods.

midnightcowboy: Probably so honored he'll try and start up the religion again....after being passed out for 12 hours.

Blue21: lol

HeirofBreath: Ha who knows. 

LordofStorm: I just thought of something, if the Spanish conquistadors were the humans and the Mexica empire were the trolls then Tenochtitlan will still be around, because given the strength the trolls have and, which is more than a human

Blue21: Holy shit the Aztec trolls would annihilate them easily! And then go on to take over the world most likely.

Lionel: And you and Quetzal would still have worshippers.

LordofStorms: Yeah and Tezca's ego would be bigger then the universe.

HeirofBreath: Which is why I shudder at the thought of him being a troll, he would be better as a human commoner in this AU.

Lionel: I'm glad Lord Tezcatlipoca is off at Las Vegas at the moment, otherwise there would be yelling.

LordofStorm: And insults, lots of insults.

*HeirofBreath changed topic to Its a Tezcatlipoca free day, lets us rejoice in it and party!*

*SmokeyEspejo has entered #aztecmythology*

SmokeyEspejo: You all can kindly suck my dick and fuck off.

*SmokeyEspejo has quit(I would be the most fucking powerful troll ever you feather for brains snakeboy!)*

HeirofBreath: I knew he was probably spying on us with his obsidian mirror ;)  
\-----------------------

*LordofStorms has entered #aztecmythology*

LordofStorms: I just finished reading the Obsidian and Blood trilogy, pretty good series.

Batman221: It is, I got all three books last month or so and while I think it could’ve been stronger in terms of ending and tying up loose ends, I still think it was a good well-written book.

LordofStorms: I didn’t mind the ending, I don’t like how she portrayed me in the first book. She made me look like...I dunno Moriarty.

Batman221: Ha ha I don’t think her version of you was an expy of Moriarty and that was only in the first book, but I can see why you think that.

LordofStorms: That’s true, at least she didn’t make mean overall baddie, but still I mean….in all the times I chatted in here, I probably looked less timid than I actually am irl.

Lionel: You have to remember Lord Tlaloc the author obviously doesn’t know you personally so how is she or he going to get it right exactly?

LordofStorms: You’re right.

LordofStorms: So if her version of me is kinda like Moriarty, then Acatl is the Sherlock of the series. 

Batman221: Lol yeah he would be the closest, and Teomitl would be Watson.

LordofStorms: Yeah and...and Mihmatini would be Mary cause she umm

Batman221: She is smart like her and she married the Watson of the books.  
\--------------------------------

*Lionel has entered #aztecmythology*  
*HeirofBreath has entered #aztecmythology*

HeirofBreath: Hello fellow mortals...stop what you’re doing and

HeirofBreath: and listen to me for I have a new ‘nnouncement!”

Lionel: Heads up, he is drunk.  
HeirofBreath: I, Quetzalpotato god of the windy thing and...and all things smart and sciency have created a new aspect!

midnightcowboy: Really now? Do tell us what’s the new aspect for lol

HeirofBreath: This new part of me...shall have dominion over the...the ‘puter and the web thingy and it shall be henceforth forever known as

*HeirofBreath changed nick to BillGates*

midnightcowboy: lol

LordofStorms: Shouldn’t the name be more Aztecy?

BillGates: You dare question my choices? I am your god so whatever I say goes…

LordofStorms: He is only a little bit drunk, the drunker he gets the more...teenage romance gossip girl he gets.

LordofStorms: He once said he created a new aspect of himself reigning over all things girly and cats who he named Missy McFluffykins

BillGates: Libel! Lies! For that I shall punish you to be...to be

LordofStorms: To be eaten by the vast glub of Alternia?

BillGates: ….yeah...that

LordofStorms: Lol.

BillGates: Now if you excuse me I’m going to do godly things.

*BillGates has left #aztecmythology(Aztec god of the windy thing)*

Lionel: Read “godly things” as I’m going to acquire more pulque.

*Lionel has quit #aztecmythology(I’m going to prevent my husband from getting more drunk, bye.)


End file.
